>Life review comes up. >All of the spirits gather to see what you accomplished

>Life review comes up
>All of the spirits gather to see what you accomplished
>Your life gets played on a billion light years inch screen
>It's just you jerking off for 70 years

Ape Out Shirt $21.68

Black Rifle Cuck Company, Conservative Humor Shirt $21.68

Ape Out Shirt $21.68

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >everyones mad
    >fail to see what the problem is
    >mutual shrug with demiurge

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Wish i could jerk off till im 70, im only 44 and my libido is already low.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I'm banking hardcore on masturbation being a thing in the afterlife or I won't know what to do with myself.

      I'm 46 and am erect over six hours a day and night. git gud son. take wellbutrin.

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      is that a heckin texaschan poster on the wall??

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Hahaha
        Holy frick
        Yeah it seems to be the case

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    TheRideNeverEnds.png

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Let's see the interactions with people and what they felt like when near me:
    >negativity
    >cringe
    >misunderstanding(s)
    Give me a better species. Shitposting online is the only way to interact with these monkeys.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >el archon: sounds like a skill issue to me
      >another 100 years

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    based
    the archons are going to try to convince you that you lived life "incorrectly" to gaslight you into reincarnating into a worse life where you are practically compelled to do worse things than fap for 70 years.
    The winning move is to not give them a chance to communicate with you at all.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      based based cringe cringe bip bop 404 ERROR ERROR

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This. Always ask for receipts. If you die and a homie shows up saying he's your spiritual guide/ancestor/God and tries to tell you that you NEED to go through the light to meet your dog Spikey then ask for proof. Tell him how do I know you're really who you claim to be and not some archonic reptilian ass demiurge minion Black person trynna gaslight me and bend my free will into feeding you more loosh through reincarnating on this gay planet?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Learn to be a real human your whole life, but at your death you are no longer human.

        Otherwise you came back here to continue your masturbation.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I don't see any other purpose in life than jerking off.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Everyone alive today was handed their reigns.
    None achieved anything now.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Serves them right for spying on me.
    That'll show them.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      jp, jerking off is one thing, but watching someone jerking off.. cmon, thats gay

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I know right

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Well how the frick is that my problem

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >It's just you jerking off for 70 years
    Not true, there's a lot of drinking in there too

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Kills are more valuable than spawns, umless you are really far out.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >day 7573
    >wakes up
    >jerks off
    >sips a green tea for 3 hours
    >jerks off
    >orders a pizza
    >eats pizza and passes out

    *glorb'all in the back* OOO he got the anchovies that time, bingo for me!
    *samha-fer throws his card on the ground* THIS IS BULLSHIT WHEN IS HE GOING TO DO BUTT STUFF

    I smile smugly, never samha, never.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The only chain pizza that serves anchovies here is papa johns and it tastes like candied corn syrup. Feels bad.

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    They take the masturbation life review and syndicate it for pay per view porn on other worlds. That way they make exponential returns on the loosh. Just be happy that millions of light years away some insectoid is watching reruns of you you furiously jerking off.

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *